My glamorous personal assistant Loretta de Cerise looked up momentarily from her Daily Mail at my impassioned pronouncement then swiftly returned to some story about the ghost of Princess Diana stalking travellers’ caravan parks or somesuch nonsense.
…(Note to self: Robin, remember to check Loretta’s job description to ascertain whether ‘reading tabloid rags all day’ is listed as one of her core duties.)
“You know, Loretta, it’s all about People Power. The little man against the big man, Derek and Goliath and all that malarkey.”
She flashed those violet eyes at me again. I steeled myself for the imminent onset of a Loretta Grumpy Moment. Imagine my surprise, therefore, when she actually smiled and put down her paper.
“Robin, I didn’t even know you were following the American elections. Yes, it’s great Obama got in again, but since when have you been interested in global politics and the endless struggle to create a more democratic world? It’s great to hear you’re engaging with the big issues a bit more, though. I’m amazed, yes, but definitely pleased! There’s hope for you yet!”
Now, whilst one should never look a gift horse in the chops and clearly one should take a moment to bask in this all-too-rare instance of Loretta being complimentary, I confess I had no idea what she was on about. I didn’t even know they were having an election in America, to be frank. Didn’t they just have one a couple of years ago?
I’m not talking about the American election, Loretta. I’m talking about this latest printout from our boffins showing how incredibly cheap international calls are with CherryCall compared with BT. We’ve managed to reduce the cost of calling overseas yet again, to a whole load of countries. If that’s not fighting the corner for the ordinary chap, I don’t know what is!”
I read out some of the highlights:
“Bangladesh: you can call there with CherryCall for just 2.5p a minute now. And do you know what BT will charge you? 28.5p. Outrageous!
China: now just 1p a minute. Or 26.5p with BT. Disgusting!
Guatemala: 9p a minute with us or 97p with them.
Jordan: 6p a minute or £1.25 with BT. ONE POUND TWENTY FIVE A MINUTE!
Liechtenstein: talk about fighting for the little folk, there’s only about twenty people living there but thanks to us, Loretta, you can call them for just 4p a minute. I can hardly bear to think what BT would charge.
Then there’s Mauritania, look…BT will charge you one pound thirty-thr…”
“Yes, OK, Robin, we get the picture. We are very very cheap and BT is very very expensive. It’s not rocket science!”
Sometimes I feel that Loretta can be a little blunt, harsh almost, in her retorts. But yet again, beneath her fiery repartee lurked a nugget of truth. No, it isn’t rocket science but it is actually rather clever.
We bring you these stupendous savings by diverting your international calls round the CherryCall international network. You just dial a special number before your normal overseas number and we do the rest.
You start by clicking right here to get the special CherryCall number related to the country you want to call.
- Next, just dial this number and listen for a polite, helpful voice (definitely not Loretta) asking you to dial your normal number.
- Dial away, including the 00 at the start as usual.
- Finish you call as normal.
- On your next bill you’ll see the call listed as the CherryCall access number not the international number you spoke to.
That’s all there is to it. No pins or passwords or usernames. Just keep a note of the CherryCall access number and use it whenever you want to call overseas.
And if you want to call up Mr Obama in the USA and wish him well, using CherryCall it’ll cost you just 1p a minute, all day every day.
Jolly clever, but jolly simple.
“So simple even you can use it!” piped up Loretta. Cruel but, sadly, true.
MD Cherry Call